“There is a way that all messy weeks begin; mostly as sad jokes”- GBOGI TOSIN


Once again, these are not the best of moments to be a UITE; the camel of these words bears a huge cargo of straws. The whole electioneering process is nothing else than a varied group of narratives; While some events are anticipated, other ones have a way of sneaking in like a bastard son!

This week is not for the exhibition of words, never! “Some ironies are rude; they should not exist in pamphlets that humans read”. My course won’t be that of a suitor that sings “Hallelujah chorus” while his in-law’s house is on fire. So, I join you, my Lords, as we take a look at this visiting gnat that has chosen to lodge at scrotum Hotels.

My lords, perhaps, there cannot be a greater twist in the electoral process than at this moment. Folks who have the hopes of a better union are possibly reconsidering their stance, sending such thoughts to the recycle bin of their minds; the disqualification of Mr. Teslim O. Teslim could be enough reason for this view. The case, a distraction, is a huge blow to the efforts being made that a sense of faith be reignited in the electorate after the Union’s seasons of inactivity, a state that has seen many calls raised for the proscription of the Union. While such opinions/calls are myopic; for the knocking rights of the ram is no enough justification for its execution , the issue at hand might just be the intoxicating palm wine that will further enhance the logical drunkenness of those who posited such.

My lords, while there is a cure for pessimism; a rational concoction potent enough to get those who are logically drunk back to a state of soberness, and subsequently optimistic ways, we might not be that lucky with apathy, for this case is nothing but meat for the greedy gods of indifference. Disqualification cases bring to fore the chances of an enhanced state of apathy as experienced over the years, this could be the anointing those who never had a stand; the Vagrants’ Union, need to further preach their somewhat heretical message. This case is unarguably a blow; the ailing consciousness of students might just be close to a hibernating state!

History should be one of the courses served at intellectuals’ dinner; the effects of Mr. Adejare Hammed Oluwadare popularly known as Jare’s disqualification (though a different case from this), in 2012, had a great effect on the Unity of Uites that the slogan of the eventual winner of the 2013 election says; “UNITING UITES”. Perhaps, whoever wins the election eventually will have to spend the greater part of his administration mending the broken fence of trust and unity; a perceived betrayal of a people by some other persons has always been part of the aftermath of the polls.

The measurement of the students’ political circle cannot possibly be accurate at this point. Perhaps Zikites, like Mellanbites did for Jare in 2012, will boycott the elections in protest and in solidarity with their own. Perhaps they won’t boycott the elections, forming an alliance with any of the other candidates. The effect of any of these is weighty; the former might mean the return of starved ballot boxes, an expression of lack of faith in the thumb system. An alliance on the other hand brings memory of the T.Cool / Labzy election; the Tedder-Mellanby rift that is, till today, a reference point to how far alliances could be harbingers/ strengtheners of conflicts.

Finally, my Lords, to say the disqualification of TOT will not affect the electoral processes, now and later, is to deliberately involve oneself in a game of deception. The road is clear, the footprints are bare; it will definitely affect!

I rest my case!




Hope is the dream of a waking man – Aristotle

It is often said that bad news like the cheetah’s legs, travel faster than a burning fire in the harmattan. My lords, it all started with rumour engraved in the carving of whispers that fly from ear to ear. Then it made it to the gathering of gossip mongers till it became the talk of the community. And while we were waiting restlessly like a man whose wife has been in the labour room, the hard news hit us like the beats of a sudden downpour, “Teslim Ogundiran Teslim, the presidential aspirant from Zik hall has been disqualified!” What is the reason? “He has a pending SDC case”.

We all know the story my Lords; it’s a popular one of how he faced SDC alongside eight other Zik hall executives on the allegation of “spending without recourse to the hall management”. However, my Lords, I am not here to retell the whole story all over again, it’s something I know you already know too well. Neither am I here to debate whether the disqualification is justified or not, for sometimes, some matters are better left untouched, unsaid, and undebated. Rather, I have come to draw your attention to some baseless arguments being peddled around by some folks that Mr. Teslim’s disqualification will affect the conduct of the coming Students’ Union election and my response to that is a capital ‘NO’. His disqualification will not affect the burning temperature of the sun neither will it affect the normal proceedings of this coming electoral process.

My lords, let’s take a trip down memory lane in the annals of Students’ Union politics, it’s over two years now when fate had dealt a similar blow on the Mellanby hall’s Presidential aspirant, Mr. Ahmed Adejare when he “soberly admitted…”. He was disqualified not even before the presidential debate but after the debate when a lot of students had made up their mind on their desired candidate. He was disqualified from running barely 24 hours before the election not based on a “pending SDC case” but on a case he has been found innocent. And what happened? Some people grumbled here and there and some murmurings followed too, yet Uites still filed out to vote in that election! The logic is simple my lords, the fate of one man cannot and can never be greater than that of about 20,000 students. This is a struggle, it is like a battle, and the falling of a warrior does not signify an end, not even a pause.

Furthermore, you will all agree with me my lords, that in this Students’ Union election, it will be an act of political suicide to put all your eggs in the single political basket of a candidate. What happens if you stumble on the way? Of course, all your eggs go crashing and that is the end. This is an act most of the electorate will obviously avoid. It is a simple philosophy of “prevention of total loss” and it is another “why”, why his disqualification will not pull a strand of hair in the coming election. I’ve also heard the rumour with one ear that Zik hall is currently working on an alliance with Tedder hall over Obeta’s candidature.

My lords, it’s pertinent to note at this juncture that I have nothing against Teslim’s candidature neither am I justifying his disqualification. My position is clear; I am simply of the opinion that his disqualification will not influence the outcome of the coming election in any way due to the facts and circumstances on ground. I foresee a greater struggle ahead of the election and a different concentration on the senate’s decision on the fate of the “ZIk9”. In the face of this greater misery, influencing the election is just like a “no case submission”.

In conclusion, my lords, to say that Mr. Teslim’s disqualification will affect the coming electoral processes at any point in time is like sitting down by the riverside waiting for the bathing of the crab. I rest my case.

CONCLUSION: This column is about you, it presents the two sides of a case courtesy of two writers from different schools of thought. “Audi alteram partem” means hear the other side before passing your judgment. Take the gavel, make your decision and slam because you are the judge in this courtroom.


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